A good kick in the butt (feedback & suggestions welcome)

  • 14. September 2012
  • Forum
 
 

I feel like I need a good kick in the butt to get moving. In other words I’m lacking ambition and motivation I could use some Inspiration. I’m 20 years old and currently a Junior at a small state college. My major is still undecided at this point but I will be retaking a few general education classes this semester anyway because I took a semester off. The semester off set me back but I also needed to find myself im often melancholy and just lost. It gets better I’m an only child and I live with my mother who just recently got married last year. She has had so much going on that she didn’t even realize I was out of school for an entire semester. (crazy huh?) Let me explain, I went to a state college at 18 years old I lived on campus my first year and my first semester was a bit of an adjustment my grades were only “average” B’s and C’s. I met a lot of people that year and I tried weed for the first time ever! In High School it just didn’t interest me at all and I always looked at it as “bad” My first time smoking was pretty much a blur but I decided ehh so this is “weed” I don’t see what all the fuss is about……

long story short I ended up in an awkward situation with another student on campus in the dorms they were drunk and had me falsely imprisoned in a bathroom! A security guard had to use the bathroom and saw what was going on I filed a police report I was pretty shaken up AFTER all that happened I started smoking with my roommate and a couple friends regularly all the time it helped me “cope” if that makes sense Finished that school year with “below average” grades. I returned to school sophomore year on “academic probation” needless to say I finished the semester with below average grades which caused my financial aid to get suspended! I had to type a letter to the school explaining why I should have it appealed and get a second chance long story short they gave me a second chance and I’ll be starting back in January since I couldn’t get all my paper work in by the fall deadline. All my friends have transferred to bigger universities and are pledging and although I’m a little envious it is also motivation to get my shit together. Should I give myself an extra two years to graduate and still transfer to a bigger university myself? I’m not adventurous and I admit I due lack ambition I’m happy remaining within a small domain and I sometimes refuse to budge unless I’m pushed.

I grew up in a single parent household as an only child and my mom always gave me whatever I wanted so i’ve never had to work for anything. she stressed good morals and values upon me but she never stressed that I do my best in school or independence so I found myself just “getting by”. I take responsibility for my laziness but I feel like she also influenced this laziness. Are there any books out that have a good message of inspiration and motivation that I can pick up? I want to find a college major that I can succeed in I’m not good in math so it can’t require much math or critical thinking and I also want to get a freaking job only thing is I have no idea how to even go about getting my first job lol I know this sounds crazy as hell but im open to all suggestions and feedback

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